Thursday, November 15, 2012

So I guess I'm in AA now.

I seem to have hit bottom. It was Babykins birthday party. I drank too much. Way too much. So much that I blacked out. At my son's first birthday party. And apparently I fed him, bathed him, and nursed him, all blacked out. Jesus fucking Christ. That's not good. Thank God we're all okay. But I don't want that for my son. I don't want that for my husband. And I sure as hell don't want that for me. I felt so ashamed the next day. And husband was pissed. He's not said a word to me about my drinking since the discovery of his sex addiction 2 1/2 years ago. He tried to talk to me about it, but I was so upset and so ashamed that I couldn't take it.

So I started going to AA meetings last week. And I'm definitely an alcoholic. Definitely. No doubts about it. Anyway. That's it for now. I'll talk more about this another time. Maybe I'll change the name to My Husband is a Sex Addict and I'm an Alcoholic.

2 comments:

  1. I wish I could give you a hug, so a cyber one will have to do {{{{{}}}} but wait. the baby is ONE already? Congratulations! That is quite an achievement. You will get through this. If it makes you feel any better. I was often blacked out... without having a drop to drink. overwhelmed, exhausted and lonely. its the toughest job in the world. xoxo

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  2. Thinking of you and wishing you well...

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